Importance of Effective Team Parenting

Dec 23rd, 2020 | by  Sweta Jaiswal


A significant factor affecting your child's growth and personality is how you raise them and what kind of parenting style you resort to. Often, it is not just you but also your partner who is equally important and involved in the tender years of nurturing your child. Hence, effective co-parenting is essential to raise your kids to be better individuals in life. Teamwork is involved in parenting, and a strong team of you and your partner can yield the best results. It is here that the root of yours and your partner's parenting styles comes into playing a major role. Understanding each other's roots for parenting is crucial, and it does have a significant impact on your kid's upbringing.

How your root (family of origin) impacts effective team parenting?

A majority of parents or new parents heavily rely on the parenting style which they were exposed to. They tend to follow the same tactics that their parents followed for them. This is because of a feeling of dedication to their parents, not realizing how to do things any other way, or liking how they were raised – that it was genuinely powerful and had a decent outcome as far as how they grew up. Be that as it may, if partners originated from homes with altogether different parenting styles, this can prompt clash and misunderstandings.

There are four main parenting styles-

1. Authoritarian Parenting

  • Authoritarian parents are usually found to be disciplinarians by nature.
  • They abstain from negotiations and follow and implement a strict discipline plan. They also tend to punish their kids as a lesson.
  • Communication is, for the most part, one way: from parent to the child. Rules, for the most part, are not clarified. Children are not heard and only seen.
  • Parents with this course of action are less nurturing, which can be overpowering in the long run. They do not consider their children's needs or feelings and demand rigid compliance.
  • Parents have high expectations with constrained flexibility.

2. Permissive Parenting

  • Such parents are open-minded and let their kids do whatever they want to do. They also tend to cater to the demands of their kids. Boundaries are less prominent. They possess a more friendly demeanour towards their offspring.
  • Their style of discipline is contrary to that of strict. They have no set rules as such and for the most part, let children figure problems out on their own. They do not hold their children accountable.
  • Communication is open, yet these parents let kids choose for themselves instead of providing guidance. 
  • Parents who fall under this class generally tend to be warm and nurturing.
  • Expectations are commonly insignificant or not set by such parents.

3. Uninvolved Parenting

  • Such parents are not much involved with their kids and provide a great deal of freedom to them. Some parents may settle on a cognizant choice to parent along these lines, while others are less keen on parenting or uncertain of what they should do.
  • No specific discipline style is used. An uninvolved parent lets a child, for the most part, do what he wants, likely due to the lack of care or information.
  • Limited communication exists in such a parenting style.
  • This category of parents offer very little nurturing.
  • Parents have few or rather no expectations from their children.

4. Assertive Parenting

  • Such types of parents are nurturing but up to a reasonable extent. They like to set some boundaries and clarify their expectations from their kids. Children of assertive parents are disciplined, responsible and also have a sense of independence. They are in control of their actions and also respect the feelings of their parents. They are more mature and are good at decision making. This parenting style is the most beneficial for children as, in this, the needs of parents and kids are considered. 
  • Discipline is maintained and in a controlled manner. Consequences and reasons behind each decision are well communicated and clarified.
  • Communication plays a major role, and all the concerns of the children and parents are considered.
  • Such parents are nurturing, respectful and teach their kids how to be respectful.
  • Expectations and objectives are flexible and expressed unmistakably. Children may have their input or contribution to their goals.

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Subsequently, it might be unwavering to the rearing style utilized in your family of origin that drives you to be the steady nurturer or an excessively severe taskmaster. Often, you and your partner may not begin excessively far apart from each other, yet over the long haul, your roles as parents solidify. Both of you may go further and further to the extreme so as to make up for what you each observe as deficiencies in how your partner handles circumstances.

On the off chance that you can't concur on an issue as partners, it is okay for one of you to withdraw incidentally or settle on a truce. Remember that you don't need to see eye-to-eye on everything. Each of you can have certain principles which are one of a kind for your relationship with your youngsters; there can be "Mother's rules" and "Daddy's guidelines." However, these distinctions ought to be on less significant issues. Additionally, you can oblige each other on certain issues in return for help on others.

A few suggestions for parents:

  • Going for a new style is always supported, but it is always better to discuss with your partner first. 
  • Do not try to avoid any situation that makes you uncomfortable or increases your burden. It is always advised to face every situation.
  • Patience is the key.
  • Do not interfere with your partner unless it is an extreme situation. Let your partner handle the situation.
  • Once the problems are solved, it is better to review and discuss. Criticize and plan things accordingly to avoid any future problems.
  • If there's a dispute, resolve it in privacy. Fighting or arguing in front of the children is never advised. 



Sweta Jaiswal

Sweta Jaiswal


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